Yesterday I shared a post about how someone can be in love, but unprepared to care for that love.
I’m blown away by how many people are experiencing this.
Some relate and are heartbroken. Some think I’m terrible for suggesting we should leave anyone who isn’t perfect.
So let’s talk about it…
The reality is that someone can love you to the extent of their capacity and it still won’t be enough for you.
Not because you’re expecting perfection but because you can hold something different, bigger, and deeper than they can even comprehend.
It doesn’t make them wrong, it just makes them wrong for YOU.
And here’s how that looks…
You know that by ignoring your need for depth and connection you are betraying yourself…
But you feel guilty because you can see that they love you as much as they’re capable of…
You don’t want to abandon them and in that, you abandon yourself…
So you spend months or years battling your own mind, your compassion and your truth in a war of words in your head that sounds like this…
“But he is so good to me…”
He can never reach your soul
“But he’s a good man.”
He is an unhealed man.
“But I know deep down he wants to get better.”
Your hope and his good intention will steal years from you.
“But I can SEE how good this could be.”
You are in love with a potential not a reality
“But I can help her.”
Not if she can’t help herself.
“But I just want to keep the peace.”
Whose peace are you keeping?
“But this could be so much more…”
But it isn’t.
Your ability to see the higher version of something is an amazing gift.
But you seeing it does not bring it into being.
You wanting it does not make it real.
Your patience is robbing you of the kind of love your soul requires.
So what can you do?
You can stay, you can wait, you can hope.
Or you can accept them for who they are but bless them from behind a boundary.
You can honor yourself enough to make space for equal love.
You can show yourself the compassion and empathy you so willingly give to others.
Ask yourself “What feels the most like SELF-respect here?” and whatever it is, do it.
It will, as they say, break your heart but fix your vision.
Because maybe you can see their soul and maybe you can feel their potential but honey if THEY can’t, you will always feel alone…
You will always feel fractured…
And you will always be thirsty. 